it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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