I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
we should paint friendship bongs
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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