he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
They took my balls.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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