My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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