Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Randomize
