do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
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He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
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