He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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