4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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