Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
