beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
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