it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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