Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
