Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Randomize
