You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
