You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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