Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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