I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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