East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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