Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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