i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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