I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
