My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
