I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
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What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
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My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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