return my video game
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Randomize