I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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