That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize
