she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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