the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
He? As in you personified your dick?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
