I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
