I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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