Farmville is her only friend.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Randomize
