Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
