Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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