I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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