What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
