You're my little dorito
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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