I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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