And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
