he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Randomize