P.S. I can't hear my feet
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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