have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Randomize