He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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