I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize