I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
