Tell her she can't have a vagina
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
tequila makes me forget i have legs
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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