I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize