I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
