If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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