Michael Bay diarrhea
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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