you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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